A Suitable
Position.
By CarrieP
It had been an
interesting if trying few weeks for Robert Kilcoyne, ever since sitting his
college exams he’d spent most of the time travelling through Europe delighted
to be away from the stifling atmosphere of the aunts that had raised him since the death of both parents
several years before. “Aunts” was quite a loose term as they were not related
by blood rather they were his mother’s closest and dearest friends and as she
considered them sisters from a very young age he always referred to them as
Aunt Sophie and Aunt Amelia. They were kind but very protective not to mention
quite strict and he found their constant attention very oppressive. After
boarding school he had to fight long and hard to attend a university away from
his home town and relished the freedom it brought and he was in no hurry to
return to a cossetted home life with only his aunts and their maids for company
so he was very careful to plan this trip secretly and in fact only told them at
the last minute. Naturally when he eventually did tell them it was not received
well but that didn’t bother him too much as he was too excited and focused at
the prospect of a summer free from women telling him what to do, what to wear,
when to be home, always orders, orders it was so stifling.
He was enjoying his new found freedom but never spent too
long in any one place as he’d wanted to experience as much as life had to offer
after so many years of excessive supervision by his aunts. It was while travelling
through the small principality of Katirinabourg in central Europe close to the
border with southern Germany he found himself a little short of funds and knew
if he contacted his aunts for money from his considerable trust fund they would
be hesitant to forward any amount beyond the fare home, he was certain they
would insist he return home immediately. He quickly realised he would have to
find some a job of some sort to finance the rest of his vacation. Having a
coffee in the small but picturesque capital he noticed an advertisement in the
local newspaper entitled: A Suitable Position.
Apparently it was for a handyman of sorts and was surprised
that the ad was in English but figured that as the tourist season was still
some way off he may have a good chance. It was too good a chance to pass up and
immediately rang the number deciding it may be best to communicate in German
one of the main languages spoken in the principality.
“Guten Tag Ich bin den job uber telefonieren” he said to the
voice at the other end.
“The position is for an English speaker” the voice responded
quite dismissively.
He quickly reverted to English and explained he thought it
more polite to open the conversation in German, the female voice softened and
after asking some cursory questions arranged an appointment for the following
afternoon with the explicit instruction that all communication must be carried
out through English, apparently the lady of the house wanted her staff to
improve their English. Who was he to argue?
At the appointed time Robert strolled up the driveway of a
large late 19th century detached house sitting in expansive grounds in
an exclusive neighbourhood. The front door was opened by a blond girl in a grey
maid’s uniform which didn’t really surprise him considering the size and
location of the house.
“Hiya, my name is Robert Kilcoyne I have an interview for
the handyman’s job with Frau Kirchen.” he said in the cocky and slightly
condescending voice he always used to people in service jobs.
“This way, Madam is
in the drawing room.” the maid replied in slightly accented but flawless
English.
She was an attractive girl, mid 20’s he guessed about five
six maybe seven and while she wasn’t heavy she certainly wasn’t skinny either
and had a more than ample bosom which he could see from the line under her
uniform was held in place by a sturdy bra. He always like big breasted girls
and although he wasn’t at all confident with girls he thought that a mere
housemaid would no doubt fall for his charms. He followed the maid across a
large hallway noticing her wonderfully rounded buttocks move in the tight
fitting skirt of her uniform dress, as she walked ahead of him her hips swayed
with each step in the glorious way that women do. Yes he thought I would like
some of that.
“I didn’t realise people still worked as uniformed servants
these days” he said as he walked alongside her. Of course he knew women of Frau
Kirchen’s rank employed uniformed maids after all his aunts retained a number
at their town house in London as well as their country estate. He was no
stranger to servants and his remark was more to assert his status over this
servant girl from the very start. He quite enjoyed the ridiculous and ironic
idea of a wealthy young man becoming a handyman for a few weeks.
“Well perhaps you don’t realise either that sometimes people don’t have a choice what job
they have to take” the maid replied acerbically, shooting him a sharp look for
good measure.
Skivvy – he thought to himself but said nothing and followed
in in silence.
She knocked on the drawing room door and entered.
“The person you were expecting Frau Kirchen” the maid said
addressing a middle aged but very glamorous woman sitting on an antique couch.
“Madam” Frau Kirchen said pointedly “Greta, I have told you
numerous times, you must address me as Madam.”
“Yes Madam” the maid replied obviously embarrassed at being
upbraided in front him, Robert thought.
“Are you not forgetting something else?” Frau Kirchen said.
A slight look of resentment came over the maid’s face as she
grudgingly bobbed a quick curtsy, Robert caught her eye and gave her a contemptuous
look as she finished.
“Very well you may go” Frau Kirchen dismissed her.
“So difficult to get proper servants these days” Frau
Kirchen said almost absentmindedly before turning to Robert “I require someone
to do odd jobs, some basic maintenance and other duties as may be required around
the house for several weeks or so and as the hours may be erratic the
position is live in. I have some
important and influential people visiting for time to time and it is most
important that they receive the correct impression of a properly run household
so you should know that I require total obedience and respect from my servants.
Slovenliness will not be tolerated.”
Robert was taken aback at her tone and put it down to the
famous Germanic directness, no beating about the bush like the British or
Irish. Rozamund Kirchen took a moment to look at the young man in front of her,
he was the youngest of the men she had interviewed. She could tell that he was well educated unlike the other applicants
several of whom were far too uncouth, he was of average height and though of
slight build she concluded manual work should not be a problem. He was
presentable enough although he seemed to hunch his shoulders somewhat, his
shoulder length dark brown hair was reasonably well kempt and clean and unlike
the others he had no visible tattoos which she felt was totally unacceptable in
a servant. She interviewed him for another few minutes to ascertain his
suitability for the position and if he passed muster she decided he may be of
use. After satisfying herself she wrote on
a piece of paper and handed it to him and smiled to herself as she watched his
eyes widen, his youth and inexperience could not hide his surprise as he took
in the figure she had written.
It certainly was generous, far more than he had imagined
naturally coming from such a privileged background he baulked at the idea of
being referred to as a servant – handyman had less servile connotations – however
the money would more than compensate.
“If the salary is acceptable and you are willing to agree to
my conditions the position is yours and once you sign this contract you can
start immediately.” she said.
“The salary is more
than acceptable Frau Kirchen.” he gushed and hurriedly signed the document she
extended to him.
“Very well when we are finished Greta will show you to your
room in the servants’ quarters and will make arrangements for your luggage to
be delivered here.” she said.
The elation he felt at the substantial salary was now
replaced by a feeling of humiliation at the sudden realisation that he was now
being referred to as a servant and as if
he needed confirmation his new employer added,
“Now that you are in my employ you will of course address me
as Madam”
“Yes Madam” he said glad the maid wasn’t present to witness
his embarrassment, his new employer continued.
“I have never employed a male servant before so I suppose a
curtsy may not be appropriate, a bow of the head is I believe the usual display
of respect from a male servant to his mistress, you will do so when entering
and leaving a room and also when I speak to you. Is this clear?”
He looked at her almost disbelieving at what he had just
heard but remembering that she had reminded the maid to curtsy, he felt archaic
as they were such gestures appeared to be a requirement of employees in this
household. She held his glance and arched her eyebrows in that way women do
when they dare you to defy them.
“Do you have a problem with that? It is a requirement of your
contract but if you feel you want to leave please do so now.” she finally said
with more than a hint of impatience in her voice.
This shocked him into action, the thought of losing such a
high salary and what he could do with it overrode the deepening unease he now
felt at the idea of being referred to as a “male servant” but this was no time to argue
the point.
“No Madam” he said as he bowed his head and felt a twinge of
shame, he now understood the maid’s reluctance
to curtsy- it was a humiliating experience- but he thought bad enough as
having to bow was, a curtsy was somehow even more mortifying. He was glad he
wasn’t a girl having to perform such a demeaning act.
“Much better, you must understand your salary is generous
for a reason. I expect you to follow my orders to the letter- no hesitation
whatsoever. Is that clear?”
He was acutely aware of her annoyance and didn’t want to
stretch her patience any further.
“Yes Madam” he quickly said and added a bow for good
measure.
She got up from behind the desk and walked towards him. The
room was so quiet that he could hear a swishy sound as her panty hosed thighs
rubbed together as she approached him, she was elegantly dressed in a navy blue
knee length silk dress, her auburn hair was brushed into a chignon, a pearl
choker with matching earrings gave her a regal look. She seemed to take a great
interest in his clothes.
“Have you any suitable clothes a decent jacket, good pants?”
she asked as she fingered his well -worn leather jacket and looked at his jeans
with obvious distaste.”
“Well not really I’m travelling light and all my clothes are
very casual more for vacation than anything else. I wasn’t expecting to stay
this long away.” he explained.
“Madam!” she said quietly as she looked directly into his
eyes.
“Sorry.. Madam” he apologised.
“Please don’t forget, it’s very annoying having to remind
servants to use the correct form of address to their mistress.” she said.
“Yes Madam, sorry Madam” he replied disgusted at himself for
his servile attitude.
“You can wear those for outdoor work” she said gesturing to
the clothes he was wearing “I suppose I can find you something for your house
duties. One more thing, as I mentioned some very important and powerful people
stay with me occasionally and naturally I wish to ensure their security and
privacy so I must be sure that my servants are fully vetted. I will need your passport to make the
necessary enquiries. Naturally you will receive it back after I have conducted
these investigations. For security reasons this is non-negotiable.”
He didn’t like the idea of handing over his passport but with
the papers full of celebrity gossip he could understand it and maybe he might
meet someone famous. He knew he had nothing to hide so he handed her the
passport which she placed in a desk drawer.
She rang the bell on her desk and moments later Greta
appeared.
“You rang Madam” she said and this time didn’t forget to
curtsy.
“Greta, Robert here will be my new houseboy, please show him
to his room in the servants’ quarters and make sure he familiarises himself
with the rest of the house and its rules.”
“Yes Madam” and turning to Robert said “this way”
The word “houseboy” hit him like the slap of a wet cloth and
he wanted to protest that he was applying for the position of handyman and not
some lowly domestic servant like the maid standing next to him but before he
could gather himself Frau Kirchen dismissed them both with a perfunctory
“You may go.”
Alone in the large hallway Greta turned to him with a smirk
on her pretty face.
“Not so smug now, are we? Welcome to your new life as a
domestic servant.” she said as she left him standing, mouth open at the door
and made her way across the hallway.
“I’m not a domestic servant” he snapped hurrying after her as
she went through a door behind the large staircase.
“Of course you are” she said as he caught up with her “I’m
not exactly thrilled by the idea either but it’s what we are. I’m the housemaid
and you’re the houseboy – just accept it.”
There was no way he was accepting this but felt any further
protest would be just a waste of energy, as he followed her up the back stairs
she continued,
“This is the back stairs that the servant’s use” she said
ignoring his protestations “we only use the main stairs when either cleaning or
bringing something to Madam or her guests. You must always use this stairs to
access the servants’ quarters. Oh and another thing always address her as Madam
and don’t forget to bow otherwise you get demerits leading to fines and
punishments.”
“WHAT!” he said incredulously as he quickened his step to
keep up with her “demerits, fines
punishments?”
“It’s all in the contract, don’t tell me you didn’t read it
before you signed.” she said.
“No” he replied suddenly feeling extremely foolish “I only
saw the salary.”
“Of course you did” Greta said condescendingly “well you
have little choice now I’m assuming she has your passport.”
“Yes” he said the implications of it handing over now dawning
on him.
Robert was still trying to take this in when they arrived at
the door of an annex at the back of the building. He followed her through to a
large bright and airy living room very comfortably and tastefully furnished. As
she showed around him the well -appointed and modern kitchen just off the
living room she continued.
“Well it’s not as bad as all that and at least you’re
getting extremely well paid but she is strict so you’re going to have to abide
by the contract otherwise you could find yourself in trouble with the
authorities. As she’s probably told you she has friends in very high places and
not averse to using them…. as I know to my cost.”
“What do you mean?” Robert asked.
“Do you think I chose to be her maid? Having to wear this
humiliating uniform? To be subject to her
outdated rules and regulations? I was originally employed as her
physiotherapist and after several months I wanted to leave but because there
were several months left on my contract she refused to release me. Well to make
a very long story short she threatened to have her high powered legal team take
me for everything and ruin my reputation plus she had my passport. As a
punishment for attempting to break the contract I have to work the remainder of
my time her as her uniformed maidservant.”
“So you reckon if I want to leave she will take an action
against me?” he gasped realising the full seriousness of his situation.
“Believe me you really do not want to cross her” Greta said
“and
she has your passport. However she is honest and will pay you exactly what she
agreed provided you honour your contract.”
“But she advertised the position as a handyman not a
houseboy” he said.
“If she referred to you as a houseboy then that’s what’s on
the contract and if you didn’t read it heaven knows what else is in there.
There probably be some stuff as a handyman but a lot of your work will be
around the house. Another reason she pays so well is flexibility and like
everything else it’s in the contract. Like I said- welcome to life as a
domestic servant - better get used to it. Now let’s get you to your room and
give me the details of where your luggage can be picked up as we’re not allowed
leave without permission, the front gate is locked and as you noticed there is
razor wire at the top. Oh! By the way if you challenge her you’ll receive
demerits, break anything and you will be fined the value of the item so be
careful.”
She could see by the look of shock on Robert’s face that her
account of life in Frau Kirchen’s household had clearly taken him aback and
knew it wouldn’t take long before the full realisation of what he had let
himself in for would soon reach his idiotic male brain and thought it wise to
give him some counsel before he did something really stupid.
“Look it’s not all that bad
you’re getting great money tax free, no overheads and once you’ve
completed your contract a large bonus and I mean a large bonus. As you can see this is a very
luxurious place to live, and you can even have use of the pool when Madam is
not using it. Now come on we need to get you settled. The reason for all the
rules and regulations is as she’s told you she has some very powerful and
wealthy friends and she doesn’t want to be embarrassed by her servants so she
pays outrageous money for absolute obedience.”
He thought about it as he followed her and concluded maybe
she was right after all there were a lot of pluses to the position and the
money was great and now there’s talk of a large bonus. His thoughts were
interrupted when she stopped at a door.
“This is your room” she said opening the door “I think
you’ll find it quite comfortable.”
“But it says ‘Under-housemaid -Bedroom’” he croaked gazing
at the painted sign on the door.
“So?” she asked failing to see the problem.
“Don’t you have another room I could use” he muttered horrified
at the thought of staying in a girl’s….a maid’s room.
“No, up to now this has always been an all- female household
so the rooms are allocated to female servants by their order in the household.
As there are no houseboy rooms you’ll use the under-housemaid’s bedroom I’m
down the hall in the head-housemaid’s room so technically I suppose I’m your
immediate superior” she explained and noticing his mounting discomfort added
with a sly smile “if you have a problem with that why not take it up with Madam?”
He hated the idea of every time he entered the room he would
be reminded he’d be sleeping in a maid’s room the very idea was so degrading
but he knew he would get nowhere arguing and shook his head in response. As he
stepped inside the room his worst fears were confirmed- it was undoubtedly a
girl’s bedroom. He was surprised at the size of the room which was much larger
than he had expected. A queen size antique bed with mahogany head and footboard
was covered by a baby blue satin quilt and large matching frilled pillows, a
table and two comfortable chairs sat by the large window which looked out onto
the extensive rear garden while a triptych dressing table and padded seat fitted
neatly into the corner he couldn’t help noticing it was laden with bottles and
jars of various sizes and colours. The ruffled faux silk curtains were tied
back in a sweep emphasising the ultra- feminine nature of the room and he
suddenly felt the same sense of oppressive femininity that he had been hoping
to escape from back home. While away at college his aunts had redecorated his
room in a not too dissimilar fashion which was the last straw in a seemingly
constant battle to constrain his growing masculinity and this finally had
persuaded him that a summer away from their influence would be the best course
of action. The irony of his new surroundings wasn’t lost on him.
Was there no escaping
this creeping feminisation it seemed
to be following him everywhere? he
silently cursed to himself and he only half listened to Greta as she pointed
out the various features in the room and insisted he accompany her to view the
equally spacious en suite bathroom which he noticed was fully stocked with
feminine lotions and creams.
“When your luggage arrives you can hang your clothes in
here” she said pointing to the sizable closet.
“I won’t need that much space, I haven’t that many clothes.”
he replied as she opened the door to allow him to inspect the interior.
“Probably just as well” she remarked as she viewed inside
and tried to figure out how much space her new charge would require.
Robert had to stifle a groan as he was confronted with an
array of dresses which from the style of Greta’s dress he took to be maids’
uniforms in black and grey, hanging from the rails alongside them on separate hangers
were aprons of different styles. Stacked on shelves were a number of matching
white caps of various styles and on the shelves below that several pairs of
shoes which he noticed matched the colour of the uniform dresses. She seemed
unaware of his discomfort at the sight of the feminine garments that confronted
him.
“I’ll see if I can make some extra space by combining the
dresses and aprons, here hold these” she casually remarked as she removed a
dress from the closet and handed it to him she then took an apron from its
hanger.
“Now hold the dress up, no.. a little closer to your body I
want to put this pinafore apron over it properly so it won’t be crumpled.” she
instructed and became a little irritated when he hesitated. “Oh come on for
heaven’s sake I haven’t all day”
The tone of her voice made unsettled him and he did as he
was told although feeling decidedly uncomfortable as he did so.
“It won’t bite you it’s only a uniform, hold it closer to
your body.” she snapped as he held it almost at arm’s length.
Reluctantly he complied as she drew the frilled apron over
the sleeves of the dress and finally noticing his discomfort remarked somewhat
mischievously
“Just your size”
He felt his face flush with a mixture of embarrassment and
anger but felt she would tease him further if he said anything.
She repeated the process but this time seemed to notice
something wrong with the stitching at the hem.
“Oh it’s badly torn, what was that stupid
girl doing to cause this” she remarked and he took it that she was referring to
the previous wearer of the dress, the under-housemaid. She continued,
“I just hope there’s
a dress dummy in the attic that I can hang it on as you can see I’ll need to
pin it all round to repair it properly.”
Does she really think
I give a shit about some stupid dress? he said to himself I just want her to stop yapping and leave me
alone.
When she was satisfied at the extent of the repair work that
was needed she finally allowed him to put down the dress while she removed more
from the large closet and laid them on the bed.
“I’ve got something in the oven for our evening meal that I
need to attend to and I need to phone for your belongings so you can make
yourself useful by matching the aprons with the dresses like I’ve shown you. I
expect Madam will be down later to see if you’re settling in properly so I want
to make sure everything is in order.”
She gave him no time to answer as she turned on her heel and
left him holding a maid’s dress and frilled apron. He was annoyed at the way
she’d ordered him to do something so utterly demeaning as hanging a housemaid’s
uniforms but her hasty departure denied him the opportunity to protest and he
reluctantly did as he was told. Irritated as he was by her attitude he felt
relieved he was alone as he could feel
the embarrassment rise in his cheeks when he picked up the first dress and
apron he did want anyone one witnessing his extreme discomfort as he went about
his task. He was on his last uniform when she returned.
“Not bad” she chirped as she inspected his work “you may
make a decent houseboy after all now come along let’s eat.”
He bristled once more at the term houseboy but as they’d
already had that conversation he decided there was no merit in contradicting
her again and apart from the episode with the uniforms she seemed pleasant
enough. He followed her into the kitchen where he was met by the most delicious
smell, sitting on the table was the source –a heavy earthenware dish with a
golden crust, he hadn’t had a home cooked meal since he left England and he
felt his mouth water at the prospect. She motioned him to sit and cut into the
pie and handed him the plate. The magnificent aroma made him aware that he had
not eaten that day and he wolfed the first few mouthfuls before he remembered
his manners and gathered himself to thank her. His obvious gratitude pleased
her and he thought perhaps he had been too hasty in judging her after all she
was probably in a worse position than him. They had a pleasant conversation and
seemed they had shared interests in music, books and art amongst other things maybe
having to spend a few weeks here may not be all that bad, he’d stayed in worse
places as his money ran low. The sound of the doorbell interrupted their chat
and while Greta left the table to answer it he sat back with a second glass of a
very fine Burgundy and considered his situation.
Frau Kirchen seemed to have some very strange ideas
concerning her employees but from what he’d gleaned from Greta while she may be
extremely demanding of those in her employ (he was loathe to even contemplate
the word servant) it seemed she was extremely honest in honouring to the letter
her side of the contract and expected the same from her hirelings. He reasoned
that although the employment arrangements may be somewhat unorthodox the salary
was extraordinary and he couldn’t deny the accommodation was very comfortable
even if it was the under-housemaid’s room. During the meal Greta had also
informed him of his duties and given him a list of chores in the garden which
he was to tackle the following morning she’d also mentioned he would also be
expected to help around the house. Perhaps it was the wine or maybe he was just
coming to terms with his new
surroundings but he was beginning to feel more relaxed about his situation when
Greta returned carrying a rucksack.
“Your belongings have arrived” she snorted handing it to him
“you certainly weren’t exaggerating when you said you hadn’t much by way of
luggage. It makes no difference you can use the clothes you’re wearing for
outside and if needs be I’m sure we can find something for you for inside
work.”
Usually this would have caused an outburst from him but he
thought it would be churlish to remonstrate with her after she had provided
such a magnificent meal and the wine seemed to have contributed to his mellow
mood so he took this news in his stride.
“Yeah we’ll work something out” he said causally.
“Now let’s get these cleared away it’s almost 9pm and time
for Madam’s nightly inspection before you retire for the night.” Greta informed
him.
He thought this a bit much as it was not yet 9pm and felt
another glass or two of wine with Greta might lead to something.
“You’ve got to be joking? I rarely go to bed before
mid-night and I doubt that I’ve been to bed at this time since I was a child.”
he lied knowing full well his aunts insisted on a similar bedtime when he
stayed at home.
“I wish I was but Madam has strict rules about bedtime for new
servants. Her belief is that if servants are to perform to the highest
standards then they must have adequate sleep which I suppose is hard to argue
with. I know of several establishments where the mistresses treat their
servants almost as slaves so it could be an awful lot worse and as I’ve pointed
out we don’t really have much of a choice. The contract and all that.”
Robert knew she was right of course as there had been
several articles in the papers recently about house servants being treated abysmally
by their employers however he couldn’t allow this to pass unchallenged.
“That’s’ ridiculous” he sniffed “I never heard anything so..
so…..”
“So what?” a voice from behind him interrupted him
mid-sentence.
TBC
