Below is Chapter 22.
Once again I had hoped we would be a little further along but in Lady
Charlotte’s world life moves at a more leisurely pace and she has scant regard
for the hopes and expectations of people like us.
My thanks as usual for your continuing support and also your patience
for staying with such a long and at times convoluted story.
Take care.
Carrie
A Very Victorian Education
By
CarrieP
Chapter 22
The dull clip-clop sound
of horse hooves and rumbling carriage wheels gradually made their way through
the auditory canal and into the brain of the sleeping
Aubrey St. Clair. It was the sound that usually woke him and like every other
morning for the past several months his automatic reaction before he opened his
eyes was to check the material of his nightwear. As his hands felt the soft
fabric he recognised the delicate touch of chiffon with soft, sensuous silk
underneath, he let out a sigh of resignation. There was no need to confirm by
sight that he wasn’t wearing a man’s nightshirt. Just like every other morning since he had entered the home of Lady Charlotte de Winter he found himself
enveloped in the soft embrace of silk or satin nightgowns in the most delicate
and feminine shades. And this morning like every other morning under her roof
was no different. The half awake young man was neither disappointed nor
surprised, merely resigned to his situation.
He had become used to the soft and
luxurious caress of such feminine fabrics and although he would never admit it
to anyone in this house, he was not repulsed by the sensations the garment
caused. In fact it was one of the few pleasurable moments he would experience
in any day. Invariably these sensations
led to an engorged sexual member and although extremely gratifying and sensual for
him it was considered an affront to female sensibilities and frowned upon by
Lady Charlotte and Alice, his Governess. If his manly state of arousal was
discovered it would result in a humiliating punishment. Usually this took the
form of his Governess bringing him to orgasm with a padded satin glove which
under normal circumstances would be a most desirable experience. However these
circumstances could not remotely be described as normal. Once discovered to be
in a state of arousal the entire domestic staff were assembled to witness Alice
slowly and tortuously coax his swollen organ to its inevitable climax. In her expert hand he was powerless and as
she would manipulate and massage his aching penis to orgasm he had to declare –
much to the amusement of the female servants – his fervent wish to be dressed
and treated as a girl. He knew the
consequences of such a pronouncement of course, shame, guilt, humiliation but
like any male on the cusp of orgasm he was helpless to withstand her sublime
touch and would have admitted to anything she asked, no matter how outrageous
or humiliating.
This was a morning and evening ritual over
the weeks and months under Lady Charlotte’s authority and combined with the female
clothing he was forced to wear he could feel
his masculinity ebbing away day by day. Despite this heinous treatment he felt
he still managed to retain a semblance of manliness but he was unsure how much
longer he could hold out against the constant and unwavering tide of femininity
that he was subjected to.
Now as he began to stir from his slumber he
was aware of the usual effect the soft material had on him and he could feel
another awakening between his legs, and like any male his hand automatically
slipped down the silk fabric to touch it.
His eyes opened in fright as instead of
locating a rigid penis lying on his stomach his hand was drawn between his legs
where his organ was straining but unable to assume its usual erect posture.
“Ah I see our young Miss has finally
awoken.” Lady Charlotte’s voice broke the silence as she stood over him with
Alice behind her.
“There should be no need to check if she is
a naughty girl, your ladyship.” Alice said in a confident voice and to his
consternation removed the bedclothes, lifting up his pale pink satin nightgown
to reveal a tuft of pubic hair, his penis tucked neatly between his legs, she
added with a self-satisfied smile “The device remains in place, it has never
failed yet but I think you should see for yourself.”
Lady Charlotte examined his groin closely
and with her fingers testing to see if there was any looseness in the cord holding
his member securely between his legs.
“Yes. Quite immobile.” Lady Charlotte said
as she continued to tug his corseted penis, checking for slackness and as she
fingered the glans she added, “Although it does seem to be in a state of mild
excitement. I wonder why that is?”
“Perhaps I should milk her as usual
m’lady.” Alice asked a little too quickly for Aubrey’s liking, he felt a shiver
run down his spine.
“Perhaps that may not be necessary, will it
Aubrey?” Lady Charlotte asked and touched him lightly on the cheek “That’s only
for badly behaved girls? And you’re not badly behaved, are you?”
Confined in its corset and secured between
his legs his organ was incapable of standing erect but despite this Aubrey
sensed that Alice was extremely keen not to be denied her morning custom of
degrading him in front of the servants. He also perceived that, for some reason
he could not quite put his finger on, Lady Charlotte’s manner towards him was
quite warm this morning. Of course she had always maintained that she was very
fond of him and only had his best interests at heart. She considered being
dressed as a girl could only improve his character and ultimately he would
thank her for her foresight. Naturally
he was incensed at this commandeering of his masculinity but such were his
circumstances when this outrage began he was physically powerless to prevent her
nefarious scheme. However time has a way of diluting even the strongest
emotions and his antipathy towards her dissipated and although he never
accepted his fate he did become somewhat resigned to it. He considered this a
result of not only of his confinement in silk and satin gowns but also the
exclusively female milieu from which, like his feminine clothes, there was no escape. His anger like his masculinity although not
completely subdued had indeed undergone a considerable transformation and even he
had to acknowledge he was not the arrogant and impertinent young man he once
was. In fact since yesterday he felt he had changed even more and for a reason
that escaped him he could not figure out what it was.
When
I’m fully awake I’ll think about it.
He looked at Lady Charlotte’s enquiring but
smiling face, he rarely had the option of avoiding Alice’s clutches and would
not let this rare opportunity pass even if it meant compromising what remained
of his masculinity.
“Oh no, Lady Charlotte.” he blurted and with
a furtive glace in Alice’s direction he swallowed another sliver of his pride
“I’ve been a good girl.”
He moved slighty in the bed and became
aware of a slight feeling of discomfort in his backside.
Suddenly the previous night flashed before
him and his eyes widened as he looked at Lady Charlotte. His penis immediately became
flaccid.
“You see Alice he is a good girl.” Lady
Charlotte said caressing his cheek as she noticed organ go limp.
Alice, also noticing his emasculated
member, interjected
“And well –behaved, your ladyship.”
“No
doubt you feel a little…tender.” Lady Charlotte said, a note of compassion in
her voice.
He moved again to check he wasn’t imagining
it and although it wasn’t overly painful he winced slightly.
A fog of bewilderment descended on his
brain, with his mouth agape he could only nod in repy. Lady Charlotte smiled
sympathetically.
“That’s only to be expected when a girl
experiences love for the first time.” she said and kissed him gently on the
cheek. “Now roll over and Alice will apply something to ease your discomfort
before you get dressed.”
Aubrey watched her hips sway gently as she walked
towards her dressing room. The haze in his head began to clear as Alice moved
to the bed. She looked down on him with a look of mild disappointment.
“Roll over Master Aubrey.” she instructed
and as she reached for a rubber glove he froze, noticing his expression she
smiled “I should say Miss Aubrey.”
The consequence for his manhood had
suddenly dawned on him. He felt the tears well up inside and he turned his face
to the pillow, in his distress was only barely aware of Alice turning him over.
He felt his nightgown being lifted and could no longer hold back the tears.
“Yes,” Alice said, a thoughtful look on her
face as she repeated “Miss Aubrey…yes it has a much more natural feel to it
particularly after last night.”
Of course he had been called ‘Miss’ before
by the servants and in Madame Monique’s corset emporium by everyone he came
into contact with. But this was different. Both he and Alice knew since the
events of last night there was now much more significance attached to the
feminine honorific.
“Hush now Miss” she said gently, her gloved
finger stroking his cheek. “There’s no
need to be upset. The mistress has a
beautiful body, such magnificent breasts, having them pressed against your back
must have been delightful for you.2
She paused for a moment to allow this sink
into his brain and then continued,
“You now know what women experience, to
feel someone on top of you, feeling their body press against yours, unable to
move and submitting to their will.”
His sobbed softly at her words as his
experiences from last night replayed in his head. Of course he considered his violation at Lady Charlotte’s hands outrageous
and degrading. Although even as he recalled this mortifying episode he took
comfort from the thought that at least he tried manfully to escape from under
her control. Alas such was her complete dominance over him he was unable to do
so.
“But…”Alice said her hand now gently
caressing his buttocks “I saw your face .You did derive pleasure from
her ladyship’s… shall we say … expert and gentle ministrations.”
He raised his head from the pillow his eyes
red with tears.
“I…I…”he stuttered trying to protest at
this scandalous remark.
“Don’t try to deny it.”Alice interrupted
him in a soft but firm voice “I’ve seen that look before, wide eyed and open
mouthed. And you were wiggling those hips like a shameless hussy.”
“I…I… it’s not …”he weakly objected,
knowing deep inside him that there was more than a grain of truth to what she
said.
“No need to be ashamed… Miss.”Alice
whispered into his ear “The mistress is extremely experienced in such matters. Now
that you’ve lost your virginity, like all girls it will be so much easier next
time. And if you’re a really good girl she may allow you to play with your
little clitoris. Won’t that be nice?”
“Virginity…clitoris…”he repeated, the tears
flowed once more as he buried his head in the pillow.
“There… there… my dear.”Alice said gently
kissing him on the head “As I said there’s nothing to be embarrassed or
distressed about. You should be proud that her ladyship was your first.”
Sobbing into the pillow he suddenly felt a
cool and soothing sensation as her gloved hand applied a lotion between the
cheeks of his derriere, just as he had relaxed his body he gasped as he felt something inside him. It
was uncomfortable for a second or two but not overly so and to his shame –just
like with Lady Charlotte’s incursion – he felt a stiffing in his genitals.
”It’s just another part of being a woman,
you will soon get used to it.”Alice’s voice drifted into his ears, his hips
involuntarily writhed to her touch and he desperately tried to suppress a
whimper as she continued “You will learn that being under a woman both
physically and emotionally will bring you a great deal of pleasure, if you’re
suitably submissive of course. Which, I have no doubt are or very soon you will
be.”
He felt a slight degree of discomfort but
the pleasure he experienced more than compensated for it and although he was
experiencing some unusual yet gratifying sensations he could not help but feel
extremely disturbed at her words.
Submissive? What exactly does she mean?
The thought flashed through confused brain. I
have no intention of being submissive to ….
“Ooooh.” he squealed in a most unmanly
voice, as he felt another spasm run
through his body and his hips gyrated to her touch.
As if reading his mind, another gentle
probe of her finger quickly reminded him of the irony in that thought, he
emitted another low moan of pleasure as his penis pulled against its
constraints.
“You will remain quite submissive, isn’t
that right Miss Aubrey?” Alice asked.
Oh…oh… yes… yes…”he squealed as he finally
understood he was indeed as helpless as a girl.
He felt her finger withdraw but immediately
gasped as something slightly larger replaced it. His face rose from the pillow
displaying a mixture of disbelief and bewilderment.
“Oh that?” Alice said as if what she had
just done was the most natural thing in the world “Consider it a little
reminder that you have not yet completed your education. Just because you will
be wearing those ghastly male clothes for a few hours her ladyship doesn’t want
you forgetting you’re a young lady.
She withdrew and patted him gently on his
derriere before adding
“Now time to get dressed.”
But…I…it’s…”he struggled to make sense of
his situation as he gingerly lifted himself from the bed.
Alice ignored his blubbering as she quickly
divested him of his nightgown and with a look of hauteur handed him a pair of
pale blue silk pantaloons frilled at the knees. Intensely ashamed at the
pleasure he had experienced, he could not bring himself to look her in the face
and with downcast eyes he took the now familiar ladies intimate garment and
pulled them up his legs. And as he did so he winced as he felt the unfamiliar
sensation of something inside him.
“Yes.” Alice said observing his reaction
and handing him his trousers added casually ”I expect it is a tad uncomfortable
but her ladyship does not wish you to forget all the progress you have made. I
suggested that this little object will keep your mind focused and that you are
under Lady Charlotte’s authority at all times.”
With a smile she watched him gingerly step
into the garment and the slightly uncomfortable expression on his face confirmed
he would have little difficulty in being reminded of that fact.
“Ah I see you have been fitted with your
little aide-memoire.” Lady
Charlotte’s voice announced her return. “A little…”she enquired with a smile as
she searched for her preferred choice of word “…disagreeable?”
He squirmed both physically and mentally,
his embarrassment clearly visible.
“Please Lady Charlotte…”he pleaded as he wriggled
his hips “This…thing…must I…”
“My dear, dear Aubrey,” Lady Charlotte said
in a soft but authoritative voice as she cupped his face in her hands “This really is for your own good. You
have made so much progress it would be a great shame if wearing these clothes
dragged you down into the gutter of those dreadful male habits we have all
worked so hard to raise you out of.”
Aubrey shifted from foot to foot, still
trying to come to terms with the new sensation inside him.
“But…I…”he tried to interject but Lady
Charlotte put her finger to his mouth to silence him.
“Please don’t interrupt Aubrey.” she said
firmly “As I was saying, you are evolving into a more polite, courteous,
respectful and, if I do say so myself, you are very close to becoming the
epitome of elegance and sophistication. We cannot risk you reverting to those
hideous and repellent male qualities.”
She looked at him, her face soft and
encouraging she added,
“Surely you must understand, my dear boy I
only wish to help you. You know I would
not insist on this if I thought it was not necessary. We all need a little help
to ensure we do not fall back into bad habits. To take one instance, women
especially of our class, wear corsets to ensure good posture, without them we
would slouch, fail to comport ourselves properly, not to mention risk developing
various kinds of medical problems. How could the lower orders respect us if we
did not carry ourselves like true ladies? We must bear this little discomfort
for a greater purpose. And of course it is the same for you .The little item
Alice has inserted will keep you reminded to carry yourself as a woman as well
as your promise of continuing to embrace feminine values. You do remember that
promise, don’t you?”
She patted him gently on the cheek.
Of course she was correct he had indeed
made that promise, several times in fact. However in his defence this was as a
result of months of being forced to wear corsets, petticoats and hideous silk
and satin gowns. Although he did not want to admit it he had to
accept he had lost many of his male
personality traits, quick-temper, arrogance, supreme self-confidence, masculine
entitlement to name but a few. These
were gradually but unquestionably replaced by more feminine virtues of modesty,
unassertiveness, shyness, obedience and of course submissiveness. Obviously he
had tried to resist absorbing these qualities but he feared his complete
immersion in this exclusively female realm had taken its toll and he had indeed
been imbued with certain feminine characteristics.
He was convinced that this daily
confinement in restrictive feminine clothing under the constant supervision of
a household of women would break the spirit of even the most resolute,
steadfast and masculine of young men.
Would
it not? he asked himself.
There was no need to answer, it was a rhetorical
question but he did so anyway.
Yes!
Of course it would.
“Aubrey.” Lady Charlotte’s voice
roused him from his thoughts “Are you listening to me, you silly girl. You do remember
your promise?”
The events of last night and just a few
minutes previously made any denial or protest impossible. Addressing him as a
girl merely emphasised his subjugation.
He submitted quietly to her authority.
“Yes Lady Charlotte.” he answered softly
and with great shame added “I remember.”
“Good girl.” she said her face softening
once more “Of course once you are out of male clothes your little…ahem… friend
will be removed.”
She nodded to Alice signalling her to
finish dressing him.
The approving smugness on Alice’s face only
accentuated the ignominy he felt.
He remained motionless as Alice went about
her task slipping a black silk chemise with ornate lace at the neckline over
his head and then held a white shirt for him to slip his arms into. It didn’t
take her long to button the shirt and tuck it and the chemise into his
trousers. She expertly arranged his puff tie before sliding on his waistcoat
and buttoning that also. On completion she added insult to injury as she placed
her hand between his legs to ensure his organ was securely in place and did not
show.
“Yes.” Alice complimented herself as she
ran her hand over his groin area and addressed her remark to Lady Charlotte “A
very smooth line, as if there is nothing there at all. Just like Miss Roberta
when she wore those dreadful male clothes.”
Aubrey could feel another layer of
humiliation wrap itself around him as she led him to the mirror.
“Mmm… yes your ladyship” Alice said
straightening his tie and adjusting his waistcoat as she admired her handiwork and to ensure any confidence he
felt from his new clothes was undermined she added disdainfully “Quite passable as a male if not examined too closely,
perhaps not as much as Miss Roberta but should be more than adequate
nonetheless.”
“Yes Alice I suppose it does. Although it
breaks my heart to see him in such clothes, he is far more suited to wearing a
dress but we have little choice.” Lady Charlotte sighed “The Countess has told
me her son does not like to be part of exclusively feminine company and may
refuse to accompany us to St Jude’s so she has asked me to provide some
suitably male company. ”
She
paused and stroked his cheek gently, casting her pale blue eyes over him for a
few seconds she eventually continued,
“He has such a wonderfully androgynous features
those who have met him are not quite sure if he is male or female. I would
imagine there are times when even you, dear Aubrey, are not certain either.”
She sighed once more, it was obvious to
Aubrey that seeing him in male clothes, although considered necessary for her
plan, was also slightly dismaying for her. She forced a smile before resuming.
“But today you will have to act as a
male however it is very important that during this subterfuge you do not forget
your promise to me. Your little aide-memoire
will ensure you remember this . ”
Aubrey thought he heard a snort of derision
from Alice at this remark but although he couldn’t be sure it had the desired
effect, reinforcing his lack of masculinity. She was right of course, the
object inside him did indeed remind him how Lady Charlotte had physically
treated him as a girl the previous evening. And although the initial discomfort
had subsided a little he was still acutely aware of the contraption’s presence.
She
slipped off her peignoir to reveal she had already partly dressed, in chemise
and petticoats. Alice retrieved the corset she had indicated she wished to wear
in pale blue silk. He knew from his now deep and wide knowledge that it
contained double boning throughout, the front seams had quarter inch bones. A lace trim and an ornate satin bow at the
breast gave it a delightfully feminine touch which attempted to disguise and
feminise what was an obviously formidable garment. By now of course he was
familiar with all styles of corsetry and had grown used to wearing one on a
daily basis. In fact now that he was not wearing one left him feeling a little
strange, almost exposed, as if he was only half dressed.
“I think we should allow Aubrey to lace me
Alice.” Lady Charlotte said “Obviously I would never countenance a male
performing such an intimate task but under the circumstances…”
She didn’t finish the sentence but the
inference was crystal clear.
Now that she had mounted and penetrated him
Aubrey would not under any circumstances be considered a male in her eyes.
Alice smiled at her mistress’s observation
and with a barely disguised look of contempt on her face handed him the heavy
corset.
“Perfectly understandable your ladyship.”
she said “young Miss Aubrey is as well versed in all aspects of a lady’s
toilette as any girl.”
“Yes Alice you have trained him well.” Lady
Charlotte replied much to Alice’s delight and Aubrey’s shame.
“Thank you m’lady” she said giving a respectful
curtsy
“”Come along Aubrey.” Lady Charlotte
addressed him as she positioned herself by the bedpost “We must hurry the
carriage will be here in an hour and we should have a little breakfast before
we leave.”
Alice was correct of course, Aubrey having
been subjected to being dressed as a female for several months was indeed quite
familiar with every aspect of the art of dressing and undressing in clothing of
the opposite sex.
The room fell silent as he expertly wrapped
the heavy corset around Lady Charlotte, clipping the front studs into place and
ensuring the garment settled snugly on her hips, waiting until Lady Charlotte
had arranged her breasts to her satisfaction before he continued. Beginning at
the middle as he had been taught he gently pulled the laces an inch or two
before moving to the top to do the same, then repeating the procedure, allowing
Lady Charlotte to adjust each time to the tightening around her torso. No one spoke as Lady Charlotte placed her
hands on the bedpost which was the signal for him to continue. As he drew the
laces tighter her body jerked slightly but his own everyday experience taught
him that this was normal, as were her slight groans as the garment slowly
constricted her body. Hearing her give a slight moan and seeing her body
compress as he pulled the laces gave him a feeling of control. No wonder the
maids pleaded with Alice every morning
to lace him into his corset.
“You seem to be enjoying this.” Lady
Charlotte said as if reading his thoughts, he hoped his face did not betray
him.
As he completed the procedure and tied the
long laces into a neat knot, he folded the slack and tucked it tidily under the
end of the corset. As Lady Charlotte moved to the mirror to check herself Alice
positioned another mirror so she could observe herself from the back.
“A lady’s maid could not have done it
better, don’t you think Alice?” Lady Charlotte smiled clearly delighted at
Aubrey’s efforts.
“Yes, your ladyship.” Alice answered, closely
rechecking the lacing “Like any girl, such tasks are now second nature to young
Master Aubrey.”
Naturally he felt aggrieved at both of
their remarks however he was acutely aware that to voice any protest would be
viewed as petulant and ungracious- and he knew only too well what the
consequences of such behaviour would be.
Not for the first time he swallowed his
pride and managed to force a smile. Alice seemed disappointed at him not rising
to the bait however Lady Charlotte seemed genuinely pleased with him. She
embraced him, holding him tightly and kissed him gently on the lips, such was
her effect on him that he could feel his organ swell and at the same him his
plug seemed to move inside him. His cheeks became a little flushed and he
lowered his eyes. It did not go unnoticed by Lady Charlotte.
“Oh what a perfectly delightful girlish
reaction.” she beamed “Now help Alice with my dress Aubrey.”
As they finished dressing Lady Charlotte
there was a knock on the door and Sarah one of the housemaids entered carrying
a try. Alice and Lady Charlotte moved to
the dressing table to select jewellery, Sarah drew closer to Aubrey and said
with a sweet smile,
“My, my, you do look very pretty today
Miss. I barely recognised you in those clothes.”
Referring to him as ‘Miss’ cut him like a
knife. Even when dressed as a girl he was usually addressed by the servants as
“Master Aubrey, and although it may have sounded ridiculous even a source of
amusement to them it was one of the last vestiges of masculinity he could cling
to. It reminded him underneath the silk and satin gowns, the layers of
petticoats and constricted by heavy corsetry he was still a male. Now even this
was being taken away from him. It was
clear to Aubrey that the girl had done this deliberately to demean and
humiliate him even further. Several months ago, before he had been forced into
those dreadful feminine clothes, before he was reduced to this shadow of his
former self he would have soundly rebuked her but now he had neither the
confidence or the courage to do so. Such was his impotency in the face of her
insolence the best he could do was glare at her. To his surprise, or if he was
more honest, his alarm, she was confident enough to return his glare with a well disguised
look of derision but slyly added in a pleasant voice loud enough for
Lady Charlotte to hear.
“Yes Miss, very pretty. You look quite the
gentleman.”
A little intimidated by her he took a
slight step back as she continued to hold him in her intense gaze.
“Aubrey!” Lady Charlotte voice
startled him “The girl has given you a compliment, where are your manners?”
He looked at Lady Charlotte and immediately
knew it would have been extremely difficult to convince her that the girl, a
maidservant, had been insolent to him merely by the expression on her
face. He had little choice.
“Thank you Sarah.”
“You’re welcome…”she replied in a faux
sincere voice, fixing him with her laughing grey eyes she paused a few seconds
before curtsying and adding “…Miss”
As she left she took another layer of his
masculinity with her.
“Now Aubrey, a little breakfast before we
leave.” Lady Charlotte said standing by the table waiting for him to hold the
seat for her “We need you to keep your strength up.”
He thought he heard yet another snort of
derision from Alice but Lady Charlotte appeared not to have noticed. Despite
his indignation at her continuous sniping even he had to admit he had no more
strength than a twelve year old girl.
Sitting down he winced and let out a
girlish squeal as his behind touched the chair. Lady Charlotte nodded to Alice
who immediately produced a plump pink satin cushion and placed it on the chair
with a knowing smile. He lowered himself gingerly onto the cushion and after moment
or two slowly relaxed his cheeks.
“Yes it is an efficient reminder.” Lady
Charlotte said and gesturing to the tea pot added “Now please pour our tea like
a good boy.”
He was grateful when Lady Charlotte
dismissed Alice and now alone she
discussed the day ahead with him, reminding him that the Countess considered
him to be a female who had until recently had a tendency to act and dress as a
boy. The purpose of Aubrey’s change of clothing was to provide an extra male in
the company to assuage the ridiculous sensibilities of the Countess’s son – a
young man who found an exclusively female company to be most irritating- that
he would not be overwhelmed by femininity. This idea greatly amused Lady
Charlotte and uncharacteristically she laughed loudly, well as loudly as her
impeccable ladylike manners would allow her.
“Yes, most entertaining, don’t you think so
Aubrey?”she said as she composed herself “The thought that a young man should
feel so threatened by a gathering of weak females.”
+++++++++++
Aubrey shifted uncomfortably in his chair
and it wasn’t his plug that caused his uneasiness. He knew exactly how the Countess’s
son felt but in his present circumstances could not voice his true opinion, to
do so would surely incur Lady Charlotte’s displeasure. To his shame and with a
degree of practiced eagerness that sounded quite genuine, he answered
“Yes, very amusing.”
Lady Charlotte seemed pleased with his
response and patted his knee. He could not be sure that Lady Charlotte believed
him
“Whatever the reason,” Lady Charlotte said
after sipping her tea “Your presence, dressed as you, will lure him into a
sense of security until we arrive at our destination.”
Aubrey winced at the thought of what this
young man would have to endure but said nothing.
The door opened announcing the arrival
of Roberta dressed in deep blue silk
satin gown with chenille embroidery, the narrow skirt with geometric pleats
gave Roberta an almost sculptured look no doubt as result of a long heavy and
well laced corset. She made her way across the room with a most unseemly gait
which Aubrey thought most unbecoming and did a great disservice to such a
beautiful gown. He could tell by the rustling sound that she was wearing at
least three petticoats one of which was taffeta.
What Aubrey did not notice was the look on
Lady Charlotte face observing him as he mentally inspected every inch of
Roberta. As a woman she recognised the expression on his face as being exactly
the same as any female when one of their own sex enters a room. In those few
seconds Lady Charlotte could see from the intensity of Aubrey’s gaze he was
scrutinizing and examining every aspect of Roberta , her walk, the way she held
herself and of course the gown itself. Unused to petticoats around her ankles
Roberta stumbled halfway across the room and had to hold on to a chair to
steady herself. Aubrey allowed himself a little smile, he would never be that clumsy.
So
gauche he said to himself and suddenly realising
Lady Charlotte had been studying him, he blushed.
“Yes she is rather inelegant” Lady
Charlotte, reading his mind, whispered to him as they both watched Roberta
trying to rearrange her petticoats.”That gown would look so much better on you
my darling.”
“Slowly, Roberta.” Lady Charlotte instructed her as she resumed
her journey “Small steps, just as Aubrey has taught you. Please remember you
are not in a race.”
As Roberta reached them Lady Charlotte
gestured to her to sit and join them. This manoeuvre, just like every other
that women had to perform in bulky and cumbersome garments, did not come
naturally to Roberta and she had to make a number of attempts before she could
sit comfortably. As he observed the slightly irritated look on her face as she
struggled with her unwieldy bustle Aubrey thought that even with an object
inserted in him he appeared less troubled than her. He rose from his seat and
helped her arrange her skirts so she could lower herself properly.
“Are all these really necessary Lady
Charlotte.” she said in a clearly frustrated tone as she poured herself a cup
of tea. She looked at Aubrey with envy “It took almost an hour for one of the
maids to dress me. Why can’t I dress like Aubrey? She is far more suited to
these clothes than I am.”
Aubrey desperately wanted to refute this
outrageous remark but deep down he knew that the evidence would not support his
argument. After all every woman that he had come into contact with at Madame
Monique’s had noted how elegantly he comported himself when dressed in even the
most elaborate and bulky of gowns.
“That may very well be the case.”Lady
Charlotte admitted, much to Aubrey’s annoyance but not his surprise “but if you
wish to stay under my roof you will wear what I say. You can leave now if you
wish.”
Roberta looked at Aubrey dressed in the
simple, manageable and convenient clothes of a gentleman and sighed, resigned
to her fate. Aubrey was her prize, and she had come so close to acquiring it
last night only to be foiled at the final hurdle by her godmother. She had
become infatuated by this wonderfully enigmatic not to mention extremely
attractive creature and was determined by any means necessary to claim her
trophy- even if it meant wearing this hideous feminine attire.
Her silence confirmed her submission to her
godmother’s authority.
“I thought so.”Lady Charlotte said
affirming her supremacy adding in a softer voice “You look quite delightful
that colour really does suit you.”
Over the next few minutes Lady Charlotte
outlined the Countess’s plan to dispatch her son to St Jude’s Finishing School
for Young Ladies. Aubrey could see that Roberta was intrigued and became
animated at the idea of confining an arrogant, egotistical, vexatious not to
mention misogynistic young man in an exclusively female environment where he
would be dressed as a girl. It was enough to almost make her forget her own
annoying predicament.
“Roberta, please try not get over- excited
when we are en route.” Lady Charlotte said “He may begin to suspect something
is amiss and attempt to flee and, dressed as we are, it will be difficult to
stop him.”
Something flickered inside Aubrey’s brain.
“If I was dressed in male garb I would have
no difficulty in preventing any escape.” Roberta said.
Difficult
to stop him!, Escape!
Lady Charlotte and Roberta’s words reverberated in Aubrey’s head.
“I do not foresee such a situation arising.”
her godmother replied “Aubrey, dressed as he is, will reinforce the ridiculous
sense of masculine superiority – until it is too late.”
Roberta looked at Aubrey with an expression
of mild scepticism.
“She will have to act a lot more manly.”
Roberta smirked “For heaven’s sake Aubrey sit in a more masculine fashion.”
A puzzled look came over Aubrey’s face.
“Your legs, my dear.” she said softening
her tone as if talking to a child “You have them crossed at the ankles just the
way any girl would do. You must sit with your legs apart like a man, I know
it’s most undignified and probably quite indecent for someone as ladylike as you
but if you don’t the Countess’s son will think it a most peculiar pose for a
male.”
Aubrey saw Lady Charlotte doing her best to
suppress a smile and not for the first time this morning Aubrey felt his cheeks
redden. Roberta’s accurate remarks were yet another stark reminder of just how
feminised he had become. Being told by a girl how to act like a man did nothing
for his confidence and cursed himself for his inability to arrest this slide
into femininity however he immediately followed her advice and worried what
other aspects of his masculinity had he lost?
“Much better.” Roberta said and noting his
lack of a bosom she added “Your breasts have obviously being bound so pull back
your shoulders. It will give you an added appearance of masculinity.”
“Excellent advice, Roberta.” Lady Charlotte
praised her goddaughter “Your knowledge of male comportment will be most
helpful to Aubrey. Isn’t that so my dear?”
“Yes Lady Charlotte.” he answered trying to
disguise the irritation in his voice.
“It’s obviously been several years since
she has gone through her tomboy phase.” Roberta said “and is far more suited to voluminous feminine
garments than simple and convenient male attire. I should be wearing...
“Hush Roberta!” Lady Charlotte sharply
admonished her goddaughter “If you continue with the subject you will not
accompany us.”
Roberta was only too well aware of that
Lady Charlotte would carry out this threat, she frowned but remained silent,
reluctantly stifling her criticism of Aubrey’s suitability. She immediately
reasoned there was far too much at state to annoy her godmother. Witnessing the Countess’s son being detained
in such a establishment would be a delightful experience and one she did not
wish to miss. Her mother had sent her to a similar school and she found it
dreadful. It was full of fussy middle aged tutors and a curriculum based on an outmoded
ideal of femininity such as flower arranging, embroidery, management of
servants, and a heavy emphasis on fashion and grooming and something which
Roberta particularly hated- corsetry. She also did not wish to miss the
opportunity to be alone with Aubrey. If
she was honest she also did not want this delightful creature, which she had
desired from the moment they had first met, associating with a school full of
sex crazed girls. She sat quietly as Lady Charlotte continued to discuss how
she expected the day events to unfold and after several minutes she brought the
discussion to a conclusion.
“Now my dears, it is time to go.” she said
rising from her chair “The Countess will be
here shortly and we do not wish to keep her and her son waiting.
As they stood at the top of the stairs Lady
Charlotte addressed Aubrey,
“Please ensure Roberta does not stumble
Aubrey.”
Aubrey knew what she meant and turned to
Roberta who was looking down the long and wide staircase with a irritated look
on her face and muttering something under her breath.
“Oh do stop complaining Robeta.” Lady
Charlotte sighed in an exasperated tone “Aubrey will help you.”
“Lift your skirts a little higher than your
ankles with your right hand” he said quietly “and take my hand.”
Roberta glared at him at the suggestion but
knew she would struggle to negotiate the stairs alone and reluctantly she
offered her hand.
“Don’t get too used to this.” she hissed as
they safely reached the bottom rung of the stairs, her handsome face quite
clearly annoyed at her enforced dependence on him “You’ll be back in skirts
before too long.”
“Yes.” Lady Charlotte, ignoring her
goddaughter’s fit of pique, agreed with a smile as she turned to Aubrey and
straightened his tie “He does look so much prettier in a beautiful silk gown.”
“He!” Roberta repeated in
astonishment much to Aubrey’s horror.
“Oh come now Roberta.” Lady Charlotte said
with a smile and stood back to inspect his clothes and as Aubrey noticed
unperturbed at her use of the male pronoun “You must admit Aubrey does look
quite handsome, perhaps not as masculine as some of your ghastly friends but he
does have a slightly male quality about him.”
“If, by male, you mean one of those
foppish, effeminate types that are tied to their mother’s skirts,” Roberta
sneered “Then yes, Aubrey does look vaguely male.”
“Pay no heed Aubrey.”Lady Charlotte
consoled him with a smile “She is just jealous.”
“Of course there is one thing that everyone
appears to have overlooked.”Roberta said as Aubrey and Lady Charlotte looked at
her with curious expressions.
There was silence as Aubrey looked at Lady
Charlotte, Roberta sighed as moved towards Aubrey.
“The male appendage, ladies.” she said and
gestured towards his groin “Our darling Aubrey masquerading as a male is
clearly devoid of such an essential protuberance.”
Aubrey, his member neatly secreted between
his legs, winced with shame. Roberta’s observation was indeed true. His trousers
showed no discernible appearance of the defining article of the male sex.
Months of being told his countenance was more feminine than masculine had
eroded his male ego and the excursion to Madame Monique’s merely underlined
this Now finally dressed as a male the one thing that characterised a male was
absent.
“Oh dear.” Lady Charlotte sighed “well
hopefully no one will pay much attention to that… that area.”
“I could put something down there.” Roberta
said and looked at Aubrey with a grin “to make to look a little more manly.”
Aubrey had thought that returning to male
clothing would quickly restore a manly appearance but glancing in the large
hall mirror was visibly disappointed with the result and had to look long and
hard to detect a sense of that very masculinity. Months of being dressed as a
girl had distorted his sense of self, in every mirror every day he was so used to
constantly seeing himself dressed in an elegant gown it was now difficult to readjust to this strange reflection staring back at him. The image, his image,
presented a most ambiguous figure. The
face, devoid of facial hair or a strong muscular jaw portrayed the most
delicate features – the full lips, narrow jaw, and porcelain skin associated
with the weaker sex. These soft almost fragile characteristics were in stark
contrast to his male garb. However much as he tried to convince himself he was
worthy of his male attire these observations undermined his confidence, He
could not dislodge the recent memory of Roberta reminding him on how to sit as
a male and the previous night how she had considered his gait to be too
girlish. It was most disheartening to contemplate that now at last he was
dressed as a man he appeared more feminine than masculine.
“That,” Lady
Charlotte said sharply with a hint of disgust “will not be necessary. Aubrey is
far too genteel for that sort of thing.”
Alice who had been standing by the hall
window approached her mistress and interrupted the conversation.
“The Countess’s carriage has just arrived,
your ladyship.” she said.
“Come along girls.” Lady Charlotte
instructed her charges, placing Aubrey between herself and Roberta “We must not
keep the Countess waiting.”
As she slipped her arm under Aubrey’s
pulling him closer to her she whispered in his ear,
“We don’t want to lose you, my darling.”
Positioned between their swishing skirts
and rustling petticoats, his female guards led Aubrey to the door towards the
waiting carriage.
Once inside and again positioned between
Roberta and Lady Charlotte, the material of their silk and satin gowns
encroaching on his legs, it took Aubrey a moment or two to gather himself.
Opposite him sat the imposing figure of the Countess dressed in a pale lilac
silk taffeta gown, the skirt deep pleated with a festoon attached. The young
man sitting next to her was dressed in a similar fashion to Aubrey and from the
look on his face, a mixture of scorn and displeasure, it was obvious that he
was less than pleased with his new travelling companions.
Before the Countess and Lady Charlotte had
time to formally greet one another the voice of the driver came through the top
of the cab and addressed Lady Charlotte,
“Where to, your ladyship?”
Aubrey glanced at the vexatious young man
opposite him then noticed Lady Charlotte’s eyes meeting the Countess’s, they
exchanged knowing smiles before the Countess replied in a strong clear voice.
“St Jude’s.”
